Men's League Confidential

Every Friday bring you the true and pathetic tales from the beer leagues. This is what happens when you are bad at hockey and worse at blogging.

Check out Kristi's Two Minutes in the Box for a woman's take on the Colorado beer leagues. She is trying to repair the fire damage to he Sakic jersey right now.

The Director's Cut - Artem

Time for some Na-Cl.

It's so mental, it's all so mental, even a 4 on 4 summer league game and I hate that I can't break through it!

My confidence on the ice oscillates and usually it remains quite low. It's a shitty feeling, one I wish I had more control over but a mistake here, a bad pass there, add up and you start feeling like the weakest link. It's as if I fulfill the role I create for myself and once I feel like I'm playing terribly in the beginning of the game, I play terrible through out. Here's an example (and by the way, sorry for the salt-i-ness, it's just nice to vent on these things) So we have a powerplay and I get the puck out of the corner, no one is around me but I feel like everyone is looking at me and thinking "oh boy, he can't handle it that well so let's make sure we get it to someone else asap." So I fumble w. the puck, and softly pass it off to the point-man. It's kind of a silly example as I re-read it, but I remember being mad at myself for not being relaxed on the ice, I didn't have to get rid of it right away, I could have drawn a Defensemen to me and then make a play, UGH!!!! I knew that I was playing so so but the fact that I felt like the weakest link made me worse. Alright, I'm sorry for being your whiny girlfriend. I'll go make myself a sandwich and play harder next season, enjoy your weekend.

Last games of summer - Bress
We lost in the semifinals. It was a great game, though. Really. We always play bad in the beginning of games, giving up odd-man rushes, etc. But this time we pulled it together in the 2nd half, made a nice a comeback and then.... Stupid mirror shield idiot scores and screams at the bench like a bantam idiot. Ruin my night. We have a lot of those same boys coming back for the fall season. It starts wednesday and I can't wait. It seems we are going to be wearing the the tux jerseys again. I'm not against it... but those things are hot and I have new USA color gloves from mission that I kind of want to rock. Its still up for a vote. We'll see.

From Poor Corner - Scotty

Deep in the heart of the blustery hundred acre woods I recant our mens league summer season finale. For some reason the other team we played is just slightly more skilled and they converted more goals than we did. They clearly exploited a weakness whenever they found it. A defensmen having a rough few minutes or a weak spot on lenti our goalie. We were down 6-3 with like 10 minutes to go and got the game tied with 2 minutes left. I got off the ice after scoring the tie goal and was all bent out of shape because I didn't think we would have enough water for overtime and they scored a few seconds later. The worst part is that this douche-bag scored. When we tied the game we were happy with each other, not taunting the other team....when they scored, he skated by the bench looking at us screaming to be a dick. This was a good game and well played by both sides...why are you being that guy right now. This kid knows who the f he is...and plans are already in progress. The bartending woman Julie at our bar is no longer there and that is the saddest news of all.

2 Minutes for Sucking - Nemmy

So long story short: my cup, socks and breezers were in Artem's car all weekend because we wore bottoms to interview a few of the Rangers. I was going to be late for the game (I missed 4 minutes of the 1st) because I had to draft my fantasy football team. This FF league is dead-ass serious and I am the commish this year. I had our draft date scheduled for a month and told everyone that I was out of pocket. Fucking scheduling put the 1st round of hockey playoffs on my draft night. Whatever. I still made the game and pulled down Purple Jesus and Moose Jacobs with 1-2. Got great value with Greg Jennings and Dwayne Bowe and am kicking myself right now because I took Larry Maroney in the 4th after Larry Fitz. If you have NE exposure you are dying right now. DYING. Anyways I told everyone to leave my gear out in the lobby so I can run in and grab my stuff to get changed for the game with pace. I ran in, didn't see my gear which was right in front of me because I was lil drunk and an idiot, and ran to my locker empty handed. Well listen, I share a locker with a buddy so I thought I could use his stuff. When THAT wasn't an option I took to plan C and stole someone else's gear. Some random guy on the team who played before us was in the showers and I quickly threw on his pants and socks and ran out to the rink. I couldn't find his cup so I played without one. Aggressive move but Bress would have kicked me in the nuts if I didn't get on the ice so it was a calculated risk. By now you've prolly read that we lost by 1 thanks to the guy with the Ovy shield, the same one who ran Scotty from behind a few games ago. When we were out Thursday night Scotty and I hatched up a plan to kidnap him. We were 40% joking. I'm pretty sure some guy is completely confused why someone stole his pants and socks but left his wallet alone. Fall league starts Wednesday. Stay salty.